Well, I just got Jon, Search and Destroy all down for an afternoon nap. All are sleeping under protest.

The muppets are beginning to have more awake time. This translates to more awake time for Mom and Dad as well. And in two short weeks, Dad will be running the house on his own during the workweek. So after a long night followed by an early morning doctor appointment, Jon was ordered back to bed. Search and Destroy decided that they weren’t terribly interested in sleep. But, lucky for me, they were willing to compromise – they would doze as long as they were being held.

It is becoming very clear that Destroy will be the little boy who wants to crawl into bed with us on lazy mornings. His favorite thing in the world is to cuddle up against our chest. And my baby boys will be not-so-little boys in a hurry.

Both boys are continuing to grow up big and strong. Destroy has become so stout that it is tremendously difficult to burp him during/after his increasingly larger meals. Unfortunately, this means we have entered the world of projectile vomit. And “projectile” is in no way an understatement. That kid gets distance!

Yesterday evening, I ventured to the grocery store to fill our empty cupboards. (Since my last foray out of the house went so well…) When I returned home, the house was quiet. “I don’t hear crying babies,” I called out. Jon replied that there was no time for screaming since he had distracted two hungry boys with food.

I walked into the living room and my ingenious husband, aka Super Dad, had improvised. I guess necessity is the mother of invention. And it appears twins are the brothers of necessity.

I picked up Destroy when he was done scarfing.

BLARF!

With more room in his tummy, he obviously felt better for a short while – likely for the duration of the trip up the stairs to the nursery. Destroy does not like costume changes. He screamed bloody murder, exhausting himself so much that as soon as I picked him up again the two of us had to leap backwards to avoid the Exorcist-level spit-up launching itself clear across the rug onto the hardwood floor. Only then did he look up at me with a level of content. “See Mom, there’s no need to change my clothes.”

In other times of alertness, we’ve been working on tummy time. Jon works with them during periods of alertness when they are willing to push themselves – instead of giving up and immediately going to sleep. Although their corrected age is still negative one week, I don’t think it will be to long before my growing boys can roll over. Both are making huge strides on their play-mat – albeit with very different tactics.

Destroy, aka Pudge, attempts to use his greatest strengths (literally) to his advantage. He arches his back, kicking his legs up behind him and lifts his head. This leaves him balanced on his ginourmous tummy, where he teeters back and forth. Search, still lacking a nickname, can now successfully turn his head from side to side without smooshing his face into the floor. He has also managed to tuck one leg under him as he tries to crawl in vain. He’ll push and push with his little legs, knowing he’s trying to get somewhere but unsure why he’s not going anywhere yet.

Search

Destroy

In the immortal words of Dr. Suess, “Oh the places they’ll go.”

It’s been one full week with both muppets. And their actual due date is still another week away. Gramma J departed on Saturday – back to the daily grind of a new school year. That leaves just a mom, dad and two muppets to fend for ourselves.

We’ve begun developing a routine and so far the boys sleep at night. (As much as newborns sleep – 3-4 hours at a time.) And being the big boys they are (and growing still more), they have moved out of the master bedroom and into their own room. While I have always been impressed with the overall mural decorating the nursery, Search and Destroy are showing a much more intricate artistic palette and continuously concentrate on the minute textured details of all the individual leaves on the trees above their crib.

During the day we socialize and discuss the new wonders of their world, in between feedings and diaper changes. They nap downstairs in their playpen. Napping occurs only when they are too exhausted to even cry. Destroy does occasionally fall asleep, but he much prefers to do so only when lying on one of our chests. This makes getting anything actually done around the house rather difficult.

That’s no surprise to us. We knew we were facing a challenge as soon as we learned we’d be entering the parent pool at a 1:1 ratio instead of the more traditional 2:1 parents to children. So it’s a huge success when at least one of our little chores gets accomplished. (Yesterday there was no blog post because I was busy patting myself on my back for doing all the laundry. Granted there are several more loads already needing to be done today…)

Today, both boys were snoozing after their afternoon lunch (there are multiples of each meal). Everything was otherwise chill in the Stream household. I decided to take this opportunity to make a dash for the mall.

I figured that I could make it to Nordstrom and back in under an hour. Jon was willing to hold down the fort. And I needed new nursing bras. In theory, this should have been a very quick and straightforward transaction. I made it to the mall, parked in no man’s land because I’m still scared of parking stalls while in the much-larger-than-my-Accord Honda Pilot and located the lingerie department.

I asked a friendly clerk if she would be so kind as to point me toward the nursing bras. “Did you need to be measured?” she offered. I declined – just need to be pointed in the direction, thanks. Instead, she asked if I would mind waiting for her colleague to finish her transaction and she could then help me. I was slightly confused, but I patiently waited.

Finally, after about five minutes, the nursing bra clerk was available to, what I hoped, walk me over to the nursing bras. “Is this bra for you or someone else?” (Are gift bras located in a different section?) I assured her if was for me. She then paused. “Well…we’re doing inventory tonight, so we can’t touch anything in the stockroom.”

Confirm you are telling me I can’t buy anything today because you need to count what you haven’t sold later tonight?

She then suggested I come back tomorrow. I explained to her that I was shopping for said nursing bras because there were two small boys at home waiting for me and my new nursing bra. So no. I cannot simply come back tomorrow because it already took an act of God for me to dart out for this hour (a slight exaggeration). She offered to measure me and mail me a different bra tomorrow. I said thank you, but no thanks, I prefer to pick out my own undergarments.

I just wanted to spend money after shopping at a brick-and-mortar store. Unfortunately, this was not a presentable option. Corporate decision makers – if you’re out there – telling customers to go away is a bad business move in my opinion. Especially when the items relate to new babies.

Next time I’m going to stay home and nap with the boys. We live in the Silicon Valley – I’ll just order online.

We made it!

Yesterday was the one week anniversary of Destroy’s graduation. It was also the muppets first trip to the pediatrician.

This was our first trip out of the house as a complete family. So on Thursday, we decided to do a trial run and got ready for a walk around the block. The trial run was very much a trial walk-very-slowly.

After the decision to brave the outdoors was confirmed, we first needed to ensure the boys were dressed appropriately. Should they wear short sleeves with a blanket covering them? No – it was a bit windy, they might get cold. How about long sleeves and pants? Well, the sun will be shining down on them; they might get hot. Perhaps a hat is called for. Those were promptly ripped right off their little heads. We finally settled on layers: short sleeve onesie, jacket, socks and an optional blanket. Forty-five minutes later we were ready to set out.

Next came the car seat challenge. Obviously, the each kiddo has already ridden in a car seat since we drove home from the hospital. Regardless, we were determined to make sure they were comfortable and sitting up straight. (It starts early in life, “Don’t slouch! Sit up straight!”) What hadn’t yet been tested was the SUV-size land yacht of a double stroller. After about five minutes of staring at our wheeled beast, we had figured out how the sun-visors worked and the direction to move seats in order to fit the infant carriers.

It took three of us to roll the stroller the whole three feet out the door and down the two front porch steps. Did you know that double strollers have a back AND front brake? I do, now. If you leave the front brake on, nobody turns.

It was over an hour in the making, but we set out into the neighborhood for some vitamin D. We went around the block. The entire trip lasted about 10 minutes. Search immediately dozed off and Destroy just looked a bit bored. But we did it! It was, indeed, possible to leave the house with two small twin boys. We felt ready to make the perilous journey 1.2 miles down the street.

Friday morning. The boys woke up early (I know, shocking – babies getting up early) and enjoyed breakfast. Since our appointment was at 1:45 p.m., I thought it would be a wise idea to start preparing early. So at around 8 a.m., after we dined (which mostly entailed Search staring inquisitively up at me and debating whether the morning’s milk was quite to his liking), I began readying supplies for our expedition.

The diaper bag was an event. I have a diaper bag. That was about all I knew for certain needed to come with us (in addition to the stroller, car seats and babies). The pediatrician appointment was our first “well-visit,” so I knew we could expect the entire visit to last at hour at most, for both boys. For the hour the diaper bag was loaded down with two additional outfits, multiple diapers per muppet, gauze and saline wipes, tushy wipes, a changing pad, pluggies, blankets and bibs. I stashed antimicrobial water-less soap in the side pocket and two full bottles of milk in the other pocket. As we were running out the door, I threw my wallet and keys into the bag as a last-minute afterthought.

Back to the hospital. I was so pleased we’d all made it three full days without any hospital visits, I didn’t even mind our return trip. Jon got Search and Destroy safely secured into their seats and snapped into the car bases. Not content to leave my little guys alone for the entirety of the five-minute ride, I squeezed myself in between them into the middle seat of the Honda Pilot. (It’s surprisingly roomy…) Much like our rehearsal the day before, Search slept while Destroy looked a bit bored.

By far, the least exciting part of our adventure was the actual doctor’s appointment. Both boys are doing precisely what they are supposed to. Destroy, our little pudge, has reached seven pounds on his rapidly rising upward trajectory. Search, while a few ounces behind his brother, is an inch taller.

There must be a requirement in med school that pediatrician’s be low-key and laid back. Our new doctor was very informative and completely non-plussed by the 2 p.m. lunchtime meltdown. Shortly after the doctor entered the checkup room, Destroy felt the need to remind us that he was hungry. This reminded Search that, he too, was dying of hunger. Over the cacophony of shrill shrieking we learned that four months is the generally accepted timeline for venturing forth into crowds and visiting little ones can look, but not touch, our tiny muppets.

As the visit wrapped up, Destroy gave a defeated sigh and feel asleep. We triumphantly returned home from our first family outing with Destroy snoozing in his car seat and Search looking slightly bored.

Both boys enjoyed a hearty meal upon our homecoming.

I woke up at 3 a.m. this morning, courtesy of a screaming child. Destroy was hungry. (To be clear, Destroy is always hungry – he just vocalizes this point at the top of his lungs every two hours and 45 minutes.) Jon stumbled downstairs to warm up some milk while I fumbled my way into the nursery trying to soothe an angry baby. As Destroy screamed, Search woke up and decided that he wouldn’t mind something to nosh on either. After their uncivilized-hour-of-the-night snack, Destroy fell back fast asleep. Search, on the other hand, decided this would be a wonderful time to socialize. He looked up from the crib at me with wide eyes, “Let’s start the day!” Read more

The muppets take a bottle when they’re hungry. And they are hungry a lot. Destroy’s night nurse in the NICU used to call him “the alarm clock” because he’d wake up and scream every two hours and 45 minutes without fail.

As a friend of mine discovered with his little girl, “I guess that’s just the way babies are; they don’t know yet how to express the “you really should think about feeding me now” and instead go to “I’M DYING OF HUNGER! FEED ME ALREADY!!” Read more

When it became clear that the muppets were not going to make their August due date, I decided a July birthday would be great. Upon my final admittance to the hospital, I had modified my expectations and was just desperate to get through May.

“June babies!” I insisted. They have to wait for June, I prayed. They are June babies.

The night of May 28, I called the NICU to see how the muppets were doing. (Since I was still recovering from the c-section I couldn’t go visit them just yet.) “This is June, I’ll be Search’s primary nurse so I’m sure we’ll get to know each other well. The boys are doing great.”

June. One of their nurses. I had prayed hard for June babies; apparently I was not specific enough.

Thanks to our team of amazing nurses – June, Anne, Margaret and Susan among them – our boys are now home. The muppets will grow up; they’re already getting bigger. But to most of our nurses, Search and Destroy will forever be tiny babies.

Once the boys grew big enough to move out of the closed isolettes, they started wearing clothes. I have always said that I will never dress my twins alike. They are not identical. They are very much two individual people. This saddened Nurse June. She was determined to see them dressed alike. For weeks she and Nurse Susan have been threatening to get little identical outfits for them and surprise me when I arrive to visit.

Well, the boys are home now – her efforts thwarted. But since fate dealt us such an ironic blow as to have June be the nurse for my May babies, the photo below is the one and only time you will see such a sight.

June, Anne, Susan, Margaret, Jennifer and the rest of the NICU team: Thank you for helping us bring our boys home.

One time only.

Ladies and Gentlemen! Boys and Girls! Step right up. Come and see the amazing million dollar miracle muppets!

Cuter ex-preemies you will not see.

Together Again

Only 73 days it took both boys to triumph. They have shunned ventilators; defeated breathing and feeding tubes. Tripling their weight in two and a half months, these chunky monkeys are not to be missed!

This almost surreal experience of having both twins together again has been months in the making. In January, they shocked their parents by being multiples. In March, they announced a future filled with blue. In April, they began plotting the great escape. In May, they arrived at 27 weeks and 4 days.

Now, this August 9, both boys are home!

After 10.5 weeks in the hospital following Mom’s six weeks on and off in the hospital the two have undoubtedly created one impressive hospital bill. Well worth every penny. Fattened from two pounds to almost seven. Stretched from only a foot long to 19 inches. These two and a half month old babies correct their gestational age to 38 weeks today. Mere newborns!

Stubborn and fighters. The million dollar miracle muppets are home. They’re both home. Finally. The experience of finally being all together as a family is surreal.

We're all home.

Step right up. Come and see the amazing million dollar miracle muppets – living with a finally full-time mommy and daddy.

(Please remember not to touch the muppets. Previously compromised systems are still developing into healthy big boys.)

Words fail me.

Welcome home Destroy Anthony.

Born:                                   Welcomed Home:

May 28, 2010                      August 6, 2010
1:32 p.m.                               2:18 p.m.
2lbs, 3oz                               6lbs, 7oz
12.2 inches                          17.8 inches

Lyrics to Daughtry’s Home
I’m staring out into the night,
Trying to hide the pain.
I’m going to the place where love
And feeling good don’t ever cost a thing.
And the pain you feel’s a different kind of pain.

I’m going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I’m not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don’t regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old
So I’m going home.
Well I’m going home.

The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The closer I get to you.
I’ve not always been the best man or friend for you.
But your love, remains true.
And I don’t know why.
You always seem to give me another try.

So I’m going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I’m not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don’t regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.

Be careful what you wish for,
‘Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all,
And then some you don’t want.
Be careful what you wish for,
‘Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, yeah.

Oh, well I’m going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I’m not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don’t regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.
I said these places and these faces are getting old.
So I’m going home.
I’m going home.

Getting Discharged

Driving Away

Home!

Destroy is asleep. He’s lying on his tummy on Daddy’s chest.

We’re at the hospital again today. But today, we’re in a hotel-like room. It’s part of the NICU here, called the “Parent Sleep Room.” Funny huh? I wonder if they sense the irony that no parent will actually ever sleep here. Before a NICU baby graduates, parents are offered the opportunity to room-in; they spend the day with their kid – no monitors, wires, beeping or dinging. It’s meant to give paranoid parents the chance to practice. Yay, we’re a happy family but the nurses and doctors are just down the hall should anything go awry (or more likely, should parents suffer a panic attack).

Should all continue to go well, Destroy will graduate tomorrow. (I looked for a newborn size cap and gown. Wasn’t successful.)

Destroy Anthony was born 70 days ago at 2 pounds 3 ounces. He was so tiny. I didn’t even get to see him – all I got was a glance toward the Giraffe isolette as they wheeled him quickly down the hall to his Pod B6 home in the NICU. Most of the doctors repeatedly stated they thought Search would be the first muppet to break free. “Oh, definitely, he’ll be the first to go,” they’d say as they gestured toward Search.

Then 10 days ago, both muppets got their two-month vaccines. A series of three shots and that was it – instead of getting sick, Destroy broke out the big guns. I can imagine him thinking, “Oh, I am SO outta here before they stab me again!” He started eating all his food and breathing like a big boy.

We arrived at the NICU at 7:30 a.m., right after shift change. After saying hello to the boys and feeding a very hungry Search (he’s obviously not far behind), we put Destroy in a plastic wheely crib and rolled down the hallway. We quickly adjusted to having a mobile child – he’s got no strings to hold him down, he’s a REAL boy now (Pinocchio reference for any currently confused). And then we commenced staring at the child.

Destroy started out fussy and promptly conked out after an indulgent breakfast. We spent the next three hours staring at him as he slept contentedly in his bumble bouncer. He had formula for lunch and is now soundly back asleep on Daddy’s chest.

Nurse Susan and Nurse Anne (Destroy’s primary nurses for night and day shifts) will be sad to see him go. We’ll come back and visit.

Make way for muppets. Destroy is heading out with his brother not far behind.

Then

Now

Our Little All-Stars

Our baby boys aren’t so little anymore. Today’s NICU update revealed that the muppets are six pounds.

I shall repeat that.

Our tubby little muppets are six pounds. I actually asked one of their doctors if they were getting a bit swollen – water retention perhaps. “No,” came the reply. “They’re just fat.”

Two and a half months ago, I was lying in a hospital bed praying for chubby babies. Two pounds sounded huge for 27-weekers. Search and Destroy have tripled in size. Instead of purple little aliens, we have the cutest babies in the NICU. (I may be biased.) Even the nurses and doctors continuously stop by the boys crib to comment on how big they’ve grown.

Today also marks 37 weeks as the twins’ corrected gestational age. They are officially full term babies. And that means they could possibly be home soon. We’re getting close – so very close.

Our oh-so-talented muppets are also just about three for three on NICU graduation criteria.

Regulate your own temperature.
Easy-peasy. They’ve been chillin’ at a brilliantly self-regulated 98.6 (give or take a degree) since the end of June when they hit a mere three pounds.

Look! No tubes!

Breathe all by yourself.
Neither muppet has a nasal cannula any longer – or any other breathing assistance apparatus. They still swing a bit when it comes to their oxygen saturation levels, but those swings are at much higher percentages. There are no more real apnea or bradycardia episodes occurring; the only issues take place occasionally during feedings. The doctor noted that they are not as concerned with minor de-saturations that occur during meals because we know precisely why they’re happening – a large nipple is stuck in the boys mouths. (Plus, they’re still breathing. Current episodes just involve shallow breathing.)

Today we were told they just want to watch for a couple more days. We’re talking homecoming dates in days now!

Just look at those chubby cheeks!

Eat all your food.
This requirement sounds like something I’ll be dealing with for many years as a parent. “Eat the rest of your dinner, Search.” “Just a few more bites please, Destroy.”

Destroy is a rock star in this arena. Both kids are now on the “discharge diet.” This consists of straight breast milk with two servings of higher calorie formula per day. Yesterday, Destroy woke up at 9:30 a.m. for his 10 a.m. breakfast date. A nurse in our pod let the boys nurse know that I’d be in soon to give Destroy his bottle. By 9:45 a.m., Destroy was screaming so loud that the nurses were begging someone to just hurry up and feed the child. Today, Destroy drank his milk so quickly and expressed great displeasure with me when I took the bottle away. Since he was still making overt mouthing motions, I tried giving him his pluggie. That was spit out right quick with a look that clearly stated, “There is no milk in that piece of plastic, Mom.”

Search is doing well too, he’s just not quite as interested as his brother. His culinary disinterest is what puts him a couple days behind his brother in terms of release dates.

Our next step is “rooming in.” We’ll spend a day or night in a hospital hotel room (yay, spending more time in the hospital). The boys will not have any monitors or medical staff hovering around. It will be just up to us to parent them – but that non-hovering medical staff will be right there should we need them (or panic and think we need them).

We’re hoping that we’ll have a baby home by the end of the week. Eat, breathe and stay regulated boys!